Archive for 2011

Chapter 5 Crazy Little Thing

Posted on 26.6.11 by

Bryn took the stairs two at a time, and hurried down the hall until she was locked safely away in her room, the key still firmly implanted in her palm. She opened her hand to look at it again, and then very carefully placed it on her dresser while she headed to her closet. She would call Sarah and tell her she'd heard of another party tonight. Sarah was always up for that. Then they would head to The Palace, and Bryn would casually mention that Cad Dupre came to their holiday party and handed her this key. The elevator would arrive before Sarah could grill her further, and then when the alcohol began flowing Sarah would forget all together. It was the perfect plan, and Bryn felt like her entire body was filled with all this energy she'd never felt before. She wanted to run around the street and scream out loud. She could just imagine how scandalized her mother would be if she did that, but she didn't care too much. She didn't care if everyone on the Upper East Side saw her entering The Palace and headed to the Dupre suite. She was going, consequences be damned.

She searched through her closet for something to wear, but decided nothing she had would do. She wanted to be daring. She wanted to show Cad Dupre that he hadn't been wrong to invite her. She wasn't just a good little society girl who always towed the line. She was crossing the line tonight just by going to his penthouse. She'd lied to her mother, she was lying to Sarah. This felt like the craziest thing she'd ever done before, and she liked it. She wanted more of it.

Bryn made the phone call to Sarah, and as always her friend was up for it. Twenty minutes later Bryn was in the Van Loane penthouse with a big smile on her face. Sarah gave her an odd look but didn't comment, and dragged Bryn right into her closet.

"Okay," Bryn sucked in a deep breath. "Find me something-"

Sarah interrupted her before she could finish. "I know, I know. Not too much. Don't worry Bryn bear. I'm just excited you're so jazzed to do this. Where is this party anyway?" Sarah asked casually as she flipped through the racks of her clothing. She pulled out a few dresses that Bryn shook her head at and kept looking.

"The Palace." Bryn responded just as casually, hoping Sarah didn't start an inquisition yet. Her plan depended on Sarah staying in the dark until the very last minute. Thankfully Bryn spotted the perfect dress before Sarah could ask more. "That one!" She bit her lip to stop herself from smiling like the fool she felt. "It's perfect." She ran her fingers across the soft material with reverence. She was sure she'd never seen Sarah in this dress before, and she was glad. The comparisons couldn't be too damning then.

Sarah frowned. "My mom bought it for me, you can have it." Sarah pulled it down with a careless yank and held it out for Bryn. Bryn took it quickly and walked into the other room to change. Sarah was still in the closet searching for herself. "So, The Palace?" Sarah called out.

Bryn didn't respond, and instead busied herself with undressing, and pulling the dress on. It clung to her in all the right places, and when she looked into the mirror she couldn't really believe it was her. Her mother would gasp and say she looked indecent, but she didn't really care what her mother thought. She was way more interested in what Cad Dupre would say when he saw her tonight. She hoped he liked it. She hoped this was a night she would never forget.

Sarah walked out a minute later, a shorter, more provocative dress on, but Bryn didn't care. Cad Dupre gave her his key card, not Sarah. This was her night to shine, and for once she didn't feel so inferior to her best friend. Sure, Sarah looked beautiful as always, but Bryn did too. And for once she felt like she was – felt like she could do anything she set her mind to tonight. Her mind, as always, was on Cad Dupre. And perhaps she'd manage to keep his mind on her as well. The thought made her smile.

"What has you so happy?" Sarah asked as they headed for the door.

Bryn shrugged, "It's a beautiful night out, don't you think?"

Sarah watched her closely for a moment, before nodding. They didn't speak another word until they arrived at The Palace and headed for the elevator banks. It was show time, and Bryn was prepared.

When Bryn pulled out the key card and slid it in, Sarah didn't say a word. She even managed to stay silent when it dinged, and the doors slid open to the Dupre penthouse. But when Cad Dupre himself nodded at Bryn from across the room of his smoky den, Sarah could no longer hold her silence, and pulled Bryn away from the other party goers.

"What is going on, Bryn!" Sarah's voice was loud, and her face was pinched. Bryn almost laughed, it was one of the only times Sarah hadn't looked absolutely perfect. "B…?" Sarah waited impatiently.

"Cad Dupre came to my mother's holiday party. Some business thing with my father. He invited me to come over afterward to this little… gathering." Bryn decided that sounded better than party, and really since there were only about 10 other people there it couldn't be considered a party anyway.

"Cad Dupre just invited you to his penthouse… gave you a key?" Sarah stared at her incredulously.

"What?" Bryn snapped. "Guys only give you keys to this penthouse. Don't be such a bitch, Sarah." Bryn started to walk past her friend into the other room, but a contrite Sarah pulled her back quickly.

"That isn't what I mean, B." Sarah sighed, and raked her fingers through her already messy hair. "It's just… this isn't your usual crowd. Do you even know any of these people?" Sarah motioned to the other room, where girls and guys of their acquaintance were lighting up, and drinking like their lives depended on it. In truth, Bryn recognized almost every face in there, but she didn't exactly run in that circle and Sarah knew it.

"So, maybe I want a change, Sarah." Bryn pulled Sarah back further so they couldn't be overheard. "Maybe I need a change." She implored Sarah to just understand, like Bryn had always tried to do for her. "I'm sick and tired of holiday parties with my parents, and mixers with our classmates. If you didn't notice they're all boring little lemmings. And I've been the same. I've always followed the rules. And I'm sick of it…" Bryn let out a defeated breath, her mood was already souring. "I thought you of all people would understand." She whispered softly, and tried to fight off the stinging behind her eyes. She could not cry in Cad Dupre’s penthouse.

Sarah 's face immediately softened, and she put her arm around Bryn's slight shoulders. "I do understand, B.. I guess I'm just surprised. Doing wild and crazy things is my deal." Sarah laughed at herself, and Bryn cracked a tiny smile. "I'm behind you one hundred percent. You want to go crazy?" Sarah smiled devilishly. "Then let's do it." She grabbed Bryn's hand and yanked her into the other room before Bryn could even protest.

Not that she was going to anyway.

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Chapter 4 We've ran into each other

Posted on 13.3.11 by

Bryn met Cad for the second time, just months later at her mother's annual holiday party in December. He arrived in the middle of the appetizers with a file that his father wanted Harold to go over. Michelle was her usual pushy self and insisted that Cad at least stay for a bit, "you'll disappoint me if you don't," she murmured in her authoritative manner, and Cad had no choice but to relent. It was clear to Bryn that he was dressed for plans of his own, but no one dared to insult Michelle Carnduff in her own home, so he was stuck. There were two seats at the table open, one beside Harold at the head of the table where a senator had been seated before he'd been called away on some political emergency, and one right beside Bryn that had never been occupied. Cad didn't hesitate. He slid in right beside Bryn.

The next hour felt like an eternity as Bryn sat beside the object of her desires without saying one word to him. She wondered if he even remembered her from that night at his penthouse. It wasn't like she'd done anything to make an impression, except being a complete mute. Bryn decided that being that he was; Cad Dupre probably had a lot of females lose their voice around him. So she wouldn't even be special in that manner. He'd barely glanced at her at all during the main course, instead he'd mostly kept up with the business conversation at the table, and responded to whatever inane questions Michelle had asked him. Bryn felt like she was invisible, and she absolutely hated that feeling. So she leaned back in her chair, and slid her shoes off, letting her feet dance around on the hardwood floor beneath her. It felt cool against her toes, and she amused herself by tracing naughty words against it, smiling every once in a while when she decided upon a deliciously revolting phrase that would make Sarah cackle with glee, and her mother run from the room in shame.

Bryn had just traced a particularly raunchy word, and was smiling like a Cheshire cat when Cad finally turned in her direction. He was sipping at the desert brandy that the made had just served, and watching her through his lowered lashes. It took her a moment to recover, and stop what she was doing under the table. Her own desert laid untouched before her, and he looked between it and her for a moment before Michelle called out to him again, and he looked away. Bryn let out a relieved breath when she was finally out of his thrall, and searched around for her shoes beneath the table. It was time for her to retire to her room with some feigned illness. She couldn't watch her mother badger him any longer. It was just too embarrassing. He would remember her tonight for sure, as that poor unfortunate girl who's mother was such a beast. Not exactly how you wanted Cad Dupre to think of you.

"Oh Cad, I just realized. You and Bryn haven't met before, have you?"

Michelle's voice rang throughout the room like a death knell. Bryn stopped fumbling her foot beneath the table, and jerked her head around. She wanted to melt into her seat. He either remembered her, and she got into hot water with her mother when he relayed that, or he didn't and she'd realize she was as utterly forgettable as she always feared. She knew without a doubt if Michelle had asked him about Sarah he would have remembered her. No one forgot Sarah.

Cad turned in his chair again, and met Bryn's panicked gaze head on. He took his time in answering, swallowing another sip of brandy as he continued to appraise Bryn. Bryn saw recognition in his eyes, and wondered if it had always been there. She smiled unable to stop herself, and he smirked back at her. He did remember her. She no longer cared if he ratted her out to her mother, something momentous had happened tonight. She somehow mattered more because Cad Dupre knew her. He remembered their shared chair of silence. Red tinted Bryn's cheeks, and she forced herself to look down demurely. People would begin whispering if they kept staring like that.

"We've run into each other before." That was all he offered, and before Michelle could press further. He set his empty brandy glass down, and stood up from his seat. "I'm afraid I must be going." He turned to Michelle as he spoke, realizing she wore the pants in that family. "The dinner was lovely. Thank you for allowing me to share it. Mr. Carnduff." He nodded at Harold, and then turned to find Cindy eagerly waiting with his coat. He took it from her with a charming smile, and turned towards the outer room where he could finally escape.

Before he left he leaned down towards Bryn, turning his back to the rest of the room and shielding their conversation from prying eyes. "Good evening, Miss Carnduff." He smirked at her, and she smiled back, because there was nothing she wanted to do more. Then he pulled something out of his pocket and discreetly dropped it into her lap without anyone being the wiser.

"Good evening." She whispered back, clutching the fallen key card in her hands. He disappeared out of the room, and she forced herself not to watch him go. When she looked down at the card in her hands she recognized it right away. It was to his penthouse. An invitation. A little thrill shot through her body, and when she looked up again she found her mother watching her with a suspicious scowl. "He's interesting." She said, addressing the whole table, and hoping the conversation got carried away before her mother could grill her.

"Mmm." Michelle nodded, and then turned towards Harold and started up another line of conversation. It didn't matter though. The rest of the party was spent with whispers about the young Dupre heir, and how handsome he had become. Bryn wanted to laugh at them. Cad hadn't become anything. He always had been, and they all knew it. They feared him though, she could feel it in the room. He was a little too much like his father, all hard edges and mysterious eyes. They wanted to be close to him, to the power he emanated from his very being, but there was something about him that repulsed them as well. Perhaps some survival instinct that Bryn did not yet possess.

The party had dispersed by ten o'clock, and Bryn was still clutching the key card in her hand. She was sure by now she would have permanent dents in her palm, but she simply didn't care. She wasn't sure why he'd given it to her, or when she was supposed to use it. Was he having another party tonight? Is that what Michelle had held him up from, and was she now invited? And not just invited, but she'd been given a key. It felt sacred in some way, and she hated the thought of having to return it to him. She wanted to lock it away and savor it's meaning. He remembered her. He wanted her company. She wanted to call Sarah and ask her what it all meant, but she hadn't shared her infatuation yet, and she didn't feel like now was the time. This was still new, still all Bryn's.

"Bryn," Michelle appeared behind her in the foyer, stopping her from ascending the stairs to her room as she wished to. Bryn turned around slowly, forcing her expression to be neutral. Her mother was a shrewd woman, and she knew Bryn better than almost anyone. "Lovely evening, don't you think? Better than expected." Michelle waited, and watched.
"Yes." Bryn nodded agreeably, and tried to head for the stairs again. Michelle reached out and physically stopped her then. "Is there something else?" She asked in her coolest tone, hoping to discourage further conversation. Bryn had enough on her mind without her mother's ceaseless meddling.

"I didn't realize you'd met the young Dupre before…" Michelle left that leading statement, and continued to scrutinize Bryn's every expression.

Bryn remained calm, and allowed a small smile to slide across her stiff lips. Her mother was playing with her now. "Just once. At The Palace. I was with daddy, I believe." Bryn's father would just assume this was true if Michelle ever asked him. "He's nice enough, I guess." Bryn shrugged, and then carefully removed her arm from her mother's grip. "I'm tired. I'm going to call Sarah, and see if she wants to sleep over tonight."

Michelle nodded. "Goodnight, darling." She dropped a quick kiss on Bryn's forehead before disappearing into another room, most likely in search of Harold so she could grill him about Bryn's supposed encounter.

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Chapter 3 A Night To Remember

Posted on 28.1.11 by

"I'm heartbroken." A smooth seductive voice sounded behind Bryn, and she closed her eyes saying a silent prayer that it wasn't who it had to be. She'd never had an actual conversation with him, but she'd eavesdropped on his conversations enough to recognize that voice. It still sent a thrill down her spine to hear him, but there was also fear and trepidation there now as well. She'd just insulted him in his own home, and the worst part was that she didn't mean a word of it. Of course she liked him, she'd liked him since she was fifteen and first laid eyes on his darkly handsome face.

"You have a heart?" Sarah jumped in with a flirty smile, and a light laugh that she always used to diffuse uncomfortable situations. Bryn mouthed a silent 'thank you' to Sarah before forcing herself to turn around, and meet Cad Dupre head on. His eyes were the first thing that sucked her in, and for a minute she truly thought she was going to stop breathing.
He was hypnotic.

"You've wounded me van Loane" He sent her a brittle smile, and Sarah tried to keep up her flirty façade, but it was crumbling quickly. For whatever reason, Cad Dupre, intimidated Sarah, and Bryn could tell she was searching for the exits already.
"Oh, I'm sure you're made of tougher stuff than that, Dupre." She glanced behind him, and a bright beautiful smile morphed over her features. "Daney!" She called out to the gorgeous Branson heir, and swished past Cad as quickly as she could to get to her old friend. Bryn opened her mouth to protest being left all alone with a boy she'd never even been properly introduced to, but Sarah was long gone.

"Shut your mouth, Sweetheart. The look doesn't suit you." There was an edge to his voice that shocked Bryn back to reality, and her attention snapped back to him. His clothes were wrinkled, his hair messy. In truth he looked completely unkempt, but he also looked like the sexiest man she'd ever seen, and that scared her. She did as he said, but still couldn't offer a proper response. She couldn't even manage, a "Hello, my name is Bryn."

He walked past her, and his movements reminded her of a Panther. He was graceful in his own way, but there was also the sense that he was stalking his prey. Currently, his prey, was the bar, and he reached for a bottle of Scotch to fill up his empty glass. Bryn observed him silently, hoping he didn't catch her staring, but unable to actually turn away from him. Besides, she felt it would put her at a distinct disadvantage if she turned her back on him. He was someone who had to be watched at all times, and even then if he sprang, she wasn't sure what she could do.

Words had always come easy for Bryn, but not tonight, not with him. He'd not only robbed her of breath it seemed, but some of her mental capabilities as well. She probably resembled a helpless little guppy to him, and later he would laugh about her with all his worldly friends. The thought made her cringe, and want to go hide in his big beautiful bathroom again. She wanted her ball gown back, and the pins in her hair. She didn't know who she was standing in her little black dress, her hair falling down her naked shoulders. This wasn't her, none of this.

He finished pouring himself a drink, and then promptly drank it down in a thirsty gulp. He refilled his glass again without looking over at her. She could have been a statue for all Cad Dupre cared. He'd already forgotten she was in the room. Bryn folded her hands before her, and forced herself to look away from him at the bar. Sarah had deserted her, but she was Bryn Carnduff, Queen B as they all called her, and she could salvage this night. Maybe if she just tiptoed out of the room, he'd forget the encounter all together and she could never revisit this humiliation again. Sarah, of course, would be getting an earful for abandoning her later.

"Here." Bryn was shocked to look up and find Cad Dupre standing right in front of her, holding out his half full glass of Scotch for her to take. She stared at it blankly for a minute, but then thankfully came to her senses and grabbed it from him. "Drink." He ordered as he stalked past her, and dropped down onto an antique arm chair that Bryn had admired earlier.

Bryn looked down into the swirling liquid, and tried not to grimace. She hated Scotch, but to refuse him would be another insult, and she'd already embarrassed herself enough. She pulled the glass to her lips slowly, and sipped at the bitter liquor. One sip, two sips, and then she finally lowered it again. She glanced at where he was sitting and found him watching her again, an impenetrable expression on his face. He probably thought she was a complete joke, but what could she do about that now.
"Come sit down." He patted the small space beside him, but Bryn didn't move. She just watched him warily, trying to figure out what was going on in his head. "Come." His eyes met hers dead on, and he refused to drop his gaze. The sucking and whooshing started up again, and Bryn decided to sit just so she didn't faint.

He didn't move over to accommodate her, so when she sat their thighs were pressed up against each other, and her dress spilled over his pants leg. Black on black. It should have looked funny, but it didn't. Instead, it looked right, and that thought made a warm heat spread down Bryn's neck. She'd kissed boys before, but they were only boys, and she knew right from the first moment she'd seen Cad Dupre he'd never been a boy. He'd been born with this power and confidence that she so desperately craved for herself. It was what her mother had, but her father lacked, what she herself could never hope to attain. Cad Dupre made it all seem effortless though, and she envied him for that. They came from the same world, but some part of her knew even then they were light years apart.

He grabbed his glass of Scotch back from her, and threw back his head as he finished it off. She watched his throat muscles ripple as he swallowed, and her blush turned hotter until she made herself look away from him. She heard, rather than saw, him place the glass on the plushly carpeted floor, and then there was complete silence again. She wondered if he was watching her. She wondered when he would get bored with her company and head back into the other room to find that redhead or the blond from earlier. They obviously knew how to deal with men like Cad Dupre. Bryn had always thought she did, but tonight she realized how sorely wrong she was.

She felt the material of her dress rustle against her bare legs, and she turned back to find him rubbing the dress through his fingers. It seemed like an absent minded gesture, but it made Bryn's heart speed up all the same. If he had been a boy from St. Judes she would have shooed his hand away and primly told him not to wrinkle her dress. But he wasn't, and the thought of smacking Cad Dupre's hand made her want to break out in hives. He dropped her dress and it laid down against his pants again, just like before, but this time it looked more violated. It should have distressed her, but instead that same warm feeling from earlier crept back, and she had to stop herself from sighing.

She decided she only needed just a few more minutes of companionable silence with Cad Dupre to be content. Just a little more of this intoxicating feeling, and her seventeenth birthday would never be forgotten. In truth, she knew this was a story she would never tell those women at that far off charity mixer. She would never share this with Sarah either. It wasn't even something she could describe to herself. It just was, a moment in time, when they existed in the same place, and he actually knew she was alive. A moment where she actually felt like she was a living participant in her life, and not just a life sized doll her mother ordered around.

Cad laid his head back against the edge of the arm chair and closed his eyes again, just like she'd seen him do earlier. Bryn watched him silently, tracing and then retracing all the little imperfections on his face. He had a tiny scar right on the edge of his right eyebrow and she yearned to reach out and run her fingertips over it. She instead clasped them tightly in her lap. He stayed like that for quite a while, and slowly Bryn began to relax as well. Her dress was still laying against his legs, and their thighs were pressed together so tightly that she could feel the heat from his body seeping into hers. For a minute it seemed like she was absorbing his life force, and a heady feeling filled her heart. She smiled, because she couldn't stop herself. And then in the only act of defiance she could come up with, she kicked off her shoes, and let her toes rub against the amazing plush carpeting Eleanor Dupre had no doubt picked out. Her bare foot edged towards his sock encased one, and she lightly bumped him. She waited for him to open his eyes, or move his foot, but he just stayed perfectly still instead.

Bryn's heart was going so fast now she was sure it would bust out of her chest at any moment. Could he hear it? Did she even care at this point. She stared down at where their feet met on the floor. His black socks against her, perfectly pedicured pale foot. Her toes were painted with a shimmery lavender to match her gown from earlier, and the contrast with his black foot was glaring, but also captivating. She couldn't look away and she didn't want to. The fact that she was very nearly playing footsy with Cad Dupre didn't escape her, even if he didn't know it was happening.

This kind of perfection couldn't last for very long, and Bryn was brought back to reality when he let out a tired sigh and opened his eyes. Bryn quickly moved her foot away from his, but she couldn't stop herself from meeting his gaze. She could see all his secrets churning in his eyes, but she was way too terrified to even try to tap the surface. He continued to stare at her for what seemed like forever, but was actually only a few seconds. Bryn stared back, because there was nothing else she could do.

"Happy Birthday," he whispered. His voice was soft and gravelly, and it echoed all around them in the deserted room. Bryn blinked in response, and opened her mouth to respond, but the smile that flitted across his face ever so briefly stopped her. Whoosh. There he went again, stealing all her air.

He rose from the chair beside her, and her dress fell back onto her own lap. It looked lonely and bereft there, exactly how Bryn felt. She looked up to watch him leave, and found him hovering over her. His eyes had the faraway look in them again, and she wanted more than anything to ask him what he was thinking. He didn't give her the chance though. He leaned in quickly, and placed a chaste kiss upon her cheek, before running his finger through a lock of her hair, and then disappearing again.

"Thank you," Bryn whispered once he was finally gone.

She sat there for a few more minutes before Sarah reappeared, her face flushed, and an excited look in her eyes. "There you are." She acted like she'd just misplaced Bryn, but Bryn was too stunned to yell at her about her earlier abandonment. "Dane wants to make a late night run to Pinkberry and I said we would come. You're up for it right?" Bryn wanted to tell her no, that she was never leaving this place, never leaving Cad Dupre. He had a hold on her now, and her addiction was growing. She couldn't get the words out though, and Sarah took her silence for acceptance of this plan. Before Bryn knew what was happening, Sarah had grabbed her arm, and was pulling her towards the elevator as she called out her goodbyes to a few people still at the party.

Dane Bronson materialized beside them, and Bryn briefly glanced at him. It disturbed her how perfect looking he was. His hair, his eyes, even that dopey smile that mirrored the one Sarah always wore, was perfect. She now understood completely how all these seemingly smart girls fell in love with him. And looking at him, with all his innocence and exuberance for frozen yoghurt of all things, she even kind of believed that he didn't mean to break all the hearts that he did. He couldn't help it, just like Sarah.

They hopped in a cab and headed to the nearest Pinkberry. Dane paid, and he and Sarah giggled about some wild incident in a fountain a few years back that Bryn had never previously heard about. She smiled, and laughed along with them, and tried to forget that haunting man that she'd shared her life with for a few precious moments earlier in the evening. Sarah and Dane didn't seem to notice the far off look in her eyes, and for that she was grateful. Her seventeenth birthday ended with a kiss on the forehead from Dane Bronson, and one on the lips from Sarah van Loane. But years later, when she was old and gray, and thought about this night, she knew she wouldn't remember that. She would remember an antique arm chair, Scotch, black socks, lavender toes, and plush carpeting. She would remember his lips, and his hair, and the way her dress looked spread across his legs. She would remember it all, just like she knew she'd remember every moment she ever got to spend with him.

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Chapter 2 Welcome to the Club!

Posted on 27.1.11 by

“Kevin!" Sarah squealed in that patent Sarah van Loane way, and the boy with the light brown hair, and deep blue eyes smiled back at her and lifted her into his arms effortlessly.

"I was wondering if you'd forgotten," he murmured, and Bryn had to admit he had a nice voice. She knew who he was now. Kevin James. Wild party boy extraordinaire who abandoned his family a few years back to see the world, and then like all little lost UES boys came home with his head down and his hands out. The money would always be the glue that kept them together. Bryn knew that better than most.

"Never." Sarah assured him dramatically and laid a loud kiss right on his lips, before resolving herself and reaching for Bryn. "Kevin, this is my best friend in the entire world, Bryn Carnduff."

Kevin smiled at her. "Carnduff. I've heard of you." That was all he said as he assessed her, his eyes starting at the bottom and working their way up. Bryn wanted to smack him, or protest the way his eyes were traveling up her body, but when she looked to Sarah for a similar reaction Sarah just smiled and shrugged.

"Kevin James. I've heard of you." She returned, and stared him directly in the eyes when he finally made his way to her face. He stared at her another moment before a smirk broke out across his nearly perfect features, and he wrapped his arm around Sarah's shoulders.

"I like her." He said to Sarah, and Sarah just giggled, obviously amused by him.

"Fantastic," Bryn mumbled under her breath, some of her earlier confidence fading. He might be nice to look at, but there was just a bit too much arrogance there for her to be completely comfortable.

"Where is everyone else?" Sarah asked, and broke the tension.

"Follow me, my ladies." Kevin let Sarah go, and she fell back to hold onto Bryn once again, as they traveled through a few more impeccably decorated rooms until they made it into the den of indulgence as Bryn would later call it.

This room was not like all the others. Instead it centered around the multiple flat screens plastered against the falls and the odd paintings that filled up the rest of the free space. There were couches, and chairs, all exotic and foreign looking, and in the middle of the room was a table that seemed to hold every kind of drug imaginable. Smoke wafted through the air, and Bryn was tempted to hold her breath and run in the other direction. The only thing that kept it from looking like a lair from hell, was the open balcony doors, that thankfully were sucking away most of the sweet, tangy smell coming from the drugs that were no doubt being smoked. And there in the middle of all of it was the boy that Bryn had been thinking about since she was fifteen years old, Cad Dupre himself.

He still looked lonely, but perhaps a bit happier with a devoted redhead perched on his lap, and a blond practically sitting at his feet. Bryn turned away from them quickly, and briefly caught sight of Kevin whispering in Sarah's ear before he headed over to an unoccupied couch, a glass of liquor in his hand.

"Sarah," Bryn kept her voice low so she couldn't be heard, "I think we should leave now."

"Bryn," Sarah's voice turned impatient like she was speaking to a child. "Let go for one night. Have some fun. I promise I'll take care of you. I'll be your designated driver." Sarah laughed at this, but Bryn didn't find it funny. "Come on, it's your birthday B, live a little… don't you ever get bored of being perfect?"

"I'm not perfect." Bryn snapped, and glanced around the room quickly to make sure no one was watching them. Thankfully, there were enough alcohol and drugs to keep the other partygoers occupied. "I'm just… I don't do drugs." She told Sarah very primly, and folded her hands behind her back. Her mother's party seemed a bit more appealing now.

Sarah giggled. "It's just a little pot. Kevin promised me they would keep it clean tonight. I know how you are." Bryn really hated the way Sarah said that, but she kept her mouth shut because she could see her friend was trying. "You should try a little B, it might relax you. I'm sure Dane could hook you up. He's perpetually stoned."

"Dane?" Bryn repeated. Sarah seemed so at ease in this scene, and Bryn wondered when that happened. When had Sarah found an adventurous life with Kevin James and Dane Bronson, and apparently Cad Dupre, that Bryn new nothing about.

"Daney," Sarah giggled his name, and then glanced around the room in search of him. "There!" She pointed out a beautiful boy with light blue eyes and a sparkling smile who was lighting up just outside the balcony doors, a few other good looking boys crowding around him ready to share. "I'll introduce you. He'd be perfect for you B. He's staying in the city now because his grandfather wants him to start the political machine." Sarah laughed at this.

"I'm not interested," Bryn told her quickly, afraid that Sarah would meddle and try to match make. While Dane was attractive, and his pedigree would make even her mother jump in delight, Bryn wasn't interested. She'd heard enough stories about his womanizing to know that he was not a good prospect for future matrimony. And Bryn had been taught since birth that you didn't look for boyfriends, you found husbands.

"Oh, fine." Sarah pouted a little, and glanced back at him once more, before refocusing on Bryn. "Who do you want then? Look around, B. I made Kevin invite all the eligible bachelors here for you to choose from. Dane has a cute cousin Leno, but he might have a girlfriend I can't remember. And then there is Kevin, but you should know I've slept with him." Bryn made a face. "Okay, Kevin is out. He seemed to like you though."

"No, Sarah." Bryn shook her head.

"Fine, fine." She sighed and scanned the room again. "There's Dan Humfries. He's new money, but your mother is a fan of his mother's art and his dad is a rock star so that has to give him some credibility, right."

Bryn took a good look at Dan Humfries and frowned. She'd met him once before at an art gala, and they had immediately clashed. She couldn't even believe he would be here hanging out with these people, he seemed to despise them so. But then money changed everything she supposed, even the righteous fell prey to its tricks eventually.

"Come on, Bryn. Don't you want to kiss a boy tonight. Forget all the crap about finding a suitable husband. Just find a suitable playmate. You're seventeen and you've never-" Bryn reached out quickly and put her hand over Sarah's mouth. "Never been in love." Sarah finished when Bryn removed her hand.

"And you've been in love too much," Bryn shot back, growing more and more annoyed. She had no idea Sarah had assembled a meat market for her. How ridiculous, and embarrassing. She should have gone with her first instinct about this evening. "I don't kiss strangers."

"Then I'll introduce you," Sarah persevered. "Come on, they're hot, they're rich, and you need to get a little wild. You're life is boring, Bryn. Don't deny it. You just keep getting more and more unhappy, and I can't stand it anymore. Bryn's brooding days are over. Pick a boy or I'll pick for you." Sarah demanded.

"You're ridiculous." Bryn scoffed, and forced herself not to look in the direction she really wanted to. She wondered if Cad Dupre and his little harem had already found themselves a private room, or God forbid were going at it right there on that black leather couch. She couldn't stop herself from glancing over, and when she did she was surprised to find him alone, laying back against the couch with his eyes closed, and an odd expression on his face.

Sarah followed where Bryn was looking, and gasped. "No, B!"

Bryn turned back to Sarah quickly, curious as to what the problem was now. Sarah was practically pouting, and Bryn thought that should be her role since Sarah had dragged her into this thing unwillingly.

"What?" Bryn questioned confused.

"Not him," Sarah whispered, and pulled Bryn a little bit farther back from everyone else. She leaned in close, as if imparting critical information and Bryn's heart sped up a little. "He's bad. He's very bad. You can't. I can't let you." Sarah shook her head again.

"You're not making any sense, and I have no idea what you're talking about. Who is bad?" Bryn had a feeling she knew exactly who Sarah was talking about, but she still wasn't going to voice that out loud. Bryn's little fascination was hers alone, and she wasn't even going to share it with Sarah. It was too embarrassing, and Bryn didn't do embarrassment well.

"Him." Sarah wouldn't say his name, but she pulled Bryn around until they were both looking in Cad Dupre's direction. He was still lounged back against the couch, his legs outstretched before him and resting on an oddly shaped glass table before him. Bryn imagined he must have picked it up on his travels, and just the thought of that excited her. He had seen the world, done things she'd only ever imagined.

"Him," Bryn pulled herself together, and forced all thoughts of Cad Dupre out of her head. "Sarah, I've never met him. I don't even know who he is. What I do know is that I don't appreciate you bringing me up here like a slave you're trying to sell off. I hope you didn't tell anyone what you were planning."

"Of course not, Bryn." Sarah assured her. "I just told Kevin it was your birthday and I wanted to give you a good time. He took care of the rest. I didn't even know, you know who would be here, he's never in the country."

"Oh, for God's sake, Sarah," Bryn was getting irritated, "can you please just say his name."

"It might conjure the devil," Sarah mumbled under her breath, and Bryn couldn't stop herself from laughing.

Sarah laughed then too, and a few people turned in their direction. One of those people was Cad Dupre, and for a minute Bryn's gaze collided with his. It felt like all the air got sucked out of the room, and then whooshed back in at the same time, nearly socking Bryn in the chest. She'd heard you could faint from shock, but she'd never imagined you could pass out from someone looking at you. He had the darkest brown eyes though, nearly black pools actually, and she could feel herself being sucked in deep. They were bottomless, and the look in them terrified her. Before she could force herself to look away, Sarah grabbed her arm and pulled her into the deserted room they'd walked in through before.

"He's trouble, Bryn." Sarah had never looked more serious, but for some reason all Bryn wanted to do was laugh, and say so what. So what if he's trouble. So what if he's as bad as they say he is. He's beautiful, and he's seen the world, and he's everything I'll never be. Bryn wanted to say all of that to her best friend, and somehow make her understand, but she couldn't find the words, and she wasn't ready to share that piece of her soul.

"I thought you liked trouble, S." Bryn volleyed back, eager to step back into the room and see what Cad Dupre was doing then. Had she imagined him staring back at her. She sighed to herself, it was possible. Never let it be said that Bryn Carnduff didn't have a very active imagination, she did.

"I like fun trouble." Sarah returned, a worried scowl on her face. It was unusual to see Sarah van Loane anything but bubbly, but her mood had definitely taken a nose dive.

"And he's not?" Bryn knew she shouldn't push this. If she let the conversation go much further Sarah would truly become suspicious, and she could very well figure out that Bryn was slightly obsessed with the dark haired, dark eyed, wanderer in the other room. Bryn would rather die than have that happen.

"No," Sarah shook her head. "He's something else entirely. Promise me you're not going to…" Sarah couldn't even finish her thought, she just shot Bryn an imploring look, begging her to agree.

Bryn pulled herself together quickly, and plastered a fake smile on her lips. "Of course not, Sarah." She made sure it sounded like the very idea was repulsive to her, and relief flooded Sarah's face. "I would never in a million years like Cad Dupre."

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Chapter 1 Pilot

by

The first time she saw him he was standing in the middle of room full of people, hundreds of people's gazes fixed on his flawless face, and she'd gotten the feeling right then and there that she would never meet a more lonely person in her life. At fifteen, still a spoiled princess who thought life who serves her everything she ever wanted on that beautiful silver platter her father had purchased for her at birth. And he was nineteen, a Yale drop out, and still the most intriguing person in New York society. He was a Dupre, after all, and everyone knew Dupre men were born to be bad.. but then bad was oh so good to those prim and proper society girls who practically begged for his attention.

He had black hair that always looked messy even when it was perfectly styled and she had this insane urge to still his hands and tidy him up again. She could handle him better when he looked like all the other boys of her acquaintance, but when he stepped out, she became nervous and uncomfortable, and the strangest stirring spread through her body until she had to force herself to look away. She was a Carnduff after all, and staring at a boy was not proper behavior. Bryn Reese Carnduff was nothing, if not a stickler for the rules of society.

Her father worked for his father, and so she'd known him for most of her life. The dark prince who never met a girl he couldn't charm, and never met a father who didn't hate him on sight. He was dangerous, too much of everything that wasn't allowed. Bryn's mother and all her old friends would whisper about him sometimes when they had their Sunday teas. Bryn was never allowed to sit in, but she'd always snuck into undetected and listened anyway. She saturated up his exploits like other children listened to fairytales. He was an addiction she would never admit to having, not to her strict mother, or her over indulgent father. She kept her fascination with Cad Dupre very well hidden.

Later as she got older Sunday teas were opened to her, and she was allowed to hear all the obscene gossip that these good and fine ladies decided to drop into her lap. "Oh, did you hear?" They would murmur. Bryn would shake her head, and lean in, always eager for his name to be brought up. Sometimes it was. "He gambled away his father's prize horse!" Sometimes their stories revolved around his friend Dane Bronson. "He's found himself another girlfriend. His mother can't even keep track!" They would laugh wildly at the young Bronson's conquests, each secretly hoping to seduce the boy themselves. And then later as Bryn, and her best friend Sarah, grew older, their whispering even turned on her. "That wild girl… trouble." Yes, trouble surrounded Bryn Carnduff, but she'd never been harsh enough to borrow it for herself.

Not until the night of her seventeenth birthday party.

Her parents had gone all out, they'd rented the Palace hotel's ball room, and made it into quite the spontaneous affair. Bryn was never been a stranger to glitz and glamour, but there was something about that night that had felt wrong to her. It was her birthday party, but in truth she hadn't been able to choose a thing about it. Every time she had tried her mother had pushed her out of the room and instructed her to spend another hour in their home gym, "You want to look the best on your special night, darling." Bryn, the always dutiful daughter, had done as she was told, and admittedly her dress fit her beautifully when the time came. Still, she didn't imagine a hard body made a happy debutante, not this one at least.

"It's amazing, B." Sarah Van Loane, quite possibly the most beautiful girl Bryn had ever seen, came bounding over in her usual graceful way. Sarah, no matter what she was wearing, doing, or saying, always managed to come out looking perfect. Bryn tried not to be jealous of that, but nights like tonight, her night, she couldn't help herself. Sarah would no doubt be attracting most of the stares, from the boys and men alike. Not that Bryn sought out that attention… she didn't. She just didn't appreciate turning into a complete wallflower.

"I suppose." Bryn agreed with her, and took a small sip of her champagne. Sarah raised an eye brow in response, and Bryn let down her guard a little. If there was anyone she could be truthful with, it was her best friend. "It's just… all my mother's doing…" Bryn sighed, and took a larger gulp of her drink.

Sarah nodded sympathetically, and looped an arm around Bryn's tiny waist. "Well, at least she knows how to throw a party. But tonight's your night B, and I promise we'll make it special. I have a surprise for you later."

Bryn's naturally suspicious nature perked up at this, and she pulled out of Sarah's grasp to study her. There was a mischievous sparkle in Sarah's blue eyes, and that made Bryn's stomach roil with panic. Sarah's bright ideas were never that bright or fun for Bryn. In fact, she usually ended up miserable carting Sarah's intoxicated self home and dry cleaning the puke out of her clothes. That, she did not intend to put up with on her birthday.

"I don't think so." Bryn shook her head, and put down her empty champagne glass, before reaching for another as a waiter passed. "Whatever you have planned, cancel it. I want a surprise free night, Sarah." She told her hardly, but Sarah just smiled like the cat, and Bryn wanted to throttle her.

"Just wait and see. This is my present to you Queen B." With that Sarah kissed her on both cheeks, and then disappeared into the crowd of revelers that had already arrived, leaving Bryn all by herself.

"Can't wait," Bryn mumbled under her breath, and sucked down some more champagne. She could already tell this was going to be a night she'd never forget. She just hoped it didn't end in humiliation for her, and unfortunately with Sarah involved that didn't seem likely. Her plans always found a way to go way off track.

An hour later after a string quartet played the birthday song, and Michelle, Bryn’s mother, unveiled the enormous cake she'd had commissioned for the event, Bryn found herself wandering outside through the gardens, a half empty champagne glass in her hand, and a miserable expression on her face. Most of the people in that room had been complete strangers who knew her parents, or kids from her school that she didn't care about at all. Even that obnoxious Nely Kuyi had shown up, and Bryn absolutely hated her. She'd bested her on a test in the eighth grade, and Bryn was sure she'd found some way to cheat.

"Bryn!" A slightly toasted Sarah called out to her, and came barreling up from behind. Bryn turned just in time to reach out and catch her before she fell and busted her ass. "Oh," she giggled, and took a moment to right herself.

"How much have you drank?" Bryn asked, quickly dumping out the rest of her champagne in the bushes. No way would she ever let herself be seen like Sarah was now. It just was not appropriate. "Not that much, B." Sarah gave her a suppress look, and Bryn let it go. Sarah would always be Sarah. "Smile B, I'm ready to give you your surprise." Bryn's stomach flipped. "Really, Sarah, it's not necessary." Bryn assured her, and tried to walk past her friend back into the party. Sarah grabbed her arm and held her still though. Bryn was strong, but Sarah was like an Amazon and she didn't feel like being tackled into the grass. "Sarah.." Bryn warned, irritation warring with amusement.

"Come on, don't you want your birthday present. I promise you're going to like it. I picked them especially for you." Sarah shot her a toothy grin, and Bryn couldn't stop herself from smiling back. "Them?" Bryn questioned, envisioning some exotic animal appearing behind her and attacking. That would be Sarah's idea of the perfect present, and Bryn's mother's perfect nightmare. "You didn't get me a monkey did you? I told you I-" Sarah's laughter quieted Bryn's outburst. "Thank God." Bryn sighed in relief and waited for Sarah to reveal her big surprise.

"A monkey, B? Michelle would kill me. Nope, something way better. I knew your mother would just invite all those boring guys from our school who have absolutely no idea how to show a girl a good time, and you're seventeen so you should be shown a good time, and I wanted to-"
"What are you talking about?" Bryn interrupted Sarah's babbling impatiently. So far this surprise of Sarah's sounded particularly alarming. If she had hired someone to come here and show Bryn a good time, Bryn was going to scream to the high heavens and then kill Sarah, best friend or not.

"I'm getting there," Sarah reminded. "I ran into an old friend in the lobby earlier. He'd been out of town for a while and well – long story short I told him why I was here tonight, and he agreed to throwing a little after party for you. A real party, B, not this big show." Bryn relaxed a little. For once, Sarah's plan had some merit. A real party sounded amazing to Bryn, she could change out of this dress, let her hair down, and actually enjoy herself without worrying about her mother glaring at her across the room. "What friend?" Bryn needed a few more details before deciding if this was a good course of action.

"Oh, just this guy I used to hang out with. I don't think you ever met him. Don't worry about it though, he knows everyone in this city and I'm sure whatever he puts together will be so much fun. You're seventeen, Bryn, don't you want to live a little?" Sarah was like the snake holding out the big red apple for Bryn to take a bite of.

"My mother would kill me if I just left," Bryn protested weakly. In truth she was already thinking of a good excuse to allow her a speedy exit from the ball room. "You know you want to…" Sarah pressed, reaching out for Bryn's hands and twirling them both around in a haphazard fashion. For once, Sarah was right. Bryn did want to. Tonight she wanted to be anyone other than herself, and a secret party sounded like just the thing to shake up her world. No rules, no consequences, because no one would ever know.

"Alright," Bryn agreed quickly before she lost her nerve. "I'll handle my mother, you handle a change of clothes." Sarah jumped up and down, and twirled around some more like a pagan goddess on crack. Bryn smiled at her antics. "Sarah," she called her friends attention back to her, "don't go too crazy with the clothes. You know I'm not you." Sarah grinned. "Already taken care of, B. Meet me by the elevators in five minutes. Don't be late." Sarah leaned in and hugged Bryn impulsively, before gliding back out the way she came.

Exactly five minutes later Bryn was waiting in the elevator bank, nervously tapping her foot. Sarah was late, as usual. Michelle could come out of the ball room at any moment and see that her "sick little girl" wasn't so sick anymore, and definitely was not headed home to their penthouse. Sarah was dead if that happened.

"Hey," Sarah rushed up out of breath and shoved a worn Louis Vuitton bag into Bryn's arms. "Sorry, I forgot which coat check boy I'd handed this too and-" Bryn raised a hand to stop her, and Sarah just smiled. "Come on birthday girl, the night has just begun." The elevator opened before them, and Sarah pushed Bryn onto it with her. "Where are we going?" Bryn asked confused. Sarah didn't usually keep a room at the Palace.

Sarah pulled a key out of the top of her dress, and slid it into the penthouse slot. She smirked at Bryn's surprised reaction, but offered nothing more, and Bryn was too nervous to ask. Everyone knew who owned the penthouse suite, THE DUPRE family. Bryn had never actually been up there before, it was reserved for close family and friends, but she knew her father had done business there on occasion. She'd never had the nerve to pump him for information on it though, and she had no idea how Sarah had gotten a key.

"Did you steal that?" Bryn asked scandalized. She could not break and enter. Her mind was already swirling with all the awful possibilities that awaited her. "Sarah, no we can't. Let's just go back to the party." "Bryn," Sarah giggled, and framed Bryn's face between her hands. "My friend gave it to me. He's staying there right now, and this is where the party is. Aren't you curious? The Dupre penthouse! It's like legendary, and it's exactly what you deserve for your special day. I've only been up here once before, but I was pretty trashed.. I think it was awesome though." Sarah looked like a child, so excited, she was about to pee her pants.

"Who's going to be there?" Bryn wondered, all sorts of new possibilities now flooding her mind. She knew who occupied that penthouse most of the time, that same dark prince she'd obsessed over since she was a child. Last she'd heard he was in India though, trekking through the mountains, and pissing his father off more than he should have. Carl Dupre was an imposing man.

"All will be revealed in time." Sarah teased just as the elevator opened before them.
Sarah stepped out first, and when Bryn hesitated behind her she reached back and pulled her out as well. Bryn's heels slid against the marble as she took in her surroundings. The Dupre penthouse gave new meaning to abundance, and she meant that in the very best way. It was luxury and class, and everything Bryn had ever dreamed of. Her mother should take notes, she decided. This was the way to live. Bryn sighed, and Sarah nodded. "I know." They stood there for another minute, just taking it all in before Sarah came back to her senses and went into party mode again. "I think everyone is in the back, but let's find somewhere to change first. We're way too poufy for a party up here."

"Poufy?" Bryn echoed, but Sarah was already pulling her into the largest bathroom she'd ever seen. The bathtub could easily fit ten people, and Bryn just wanted to strip down and climb in. She wondered if she could just move in here, the Dupres might never notice. "Here." Sarah shoved some clothes at Bryn, and then got to quick work on her own dress and was stripped down within seconds. No one could take their clothes off faster than Sarah van Loane. "What?" Sarah caught the look on Bryn's face and stopped what she was doing. "You're not happy with what I brought you?"

Bryn looked down then at the dress Sarah had handed her and examined it. She had to admit it was cute, black, strapless, with a touch of pink at the middle. It suited her, a little daring, a little flirty, but still not as crazy as the pink sparkly number Sarah was slipping into. Tonight held promise in this dress, so without another word she slipped out of her "poof", and tried on a new persona.

"Those boys won't know what hit them." Sarah forced Bryn to twirl around for inspection, and Bryn actually found herself giggling. Between the champagne and Sarah's infectious mood, she was feeling better than she had in a while. She was seventeen, wearing a beautiful dress, and spending her first night in the hallowed halls of THE Dupre penthouse, because that cannot be emphasized enough, she decided. Years from now she would tell this story, at a charity brunch when she and all the girls she grew up with were pretending for a good cause, she would let it slip that she spent her seventeenth birthday in the Dupre penthouse. Their mouths would drop, and they'd seem a little scandalized, but it would be a victory for Bryn Carnduff and she knew it.

"Ready?" Sarah asked as she stuffed their dresses back into the bag and shoved the bag beneath the sink. Bryn wanted to protest, but something stopped her. Not tonight, she told herself and just nodded. "Good." Sarah linked arms with her, and they walked back out into the foyer.

A dull beat of music thrummed through the air, and without assistance Sarah guided them into one of the back rooms of the penthouse. Bryn tried to take in every detail as she went, but Sarah was in a hurry and most of it was a blur. They stopped at the fully stocked bar, and Sarah moved away from Bryn to launch herself into the arms of a vaguely familiar boy.

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